Angels Do Exist

I'm not gonna sugar-coat the thoughts that have been running through my mind. While I do not doubt the existence of a higher power, I have found myself very lost the last few weeks.Why my mom? Why?

 See, my mom is a "good ole gal". A working class, check to check, stand on her feet for 10 hrs straight good ole gal. She made lots of friends and even more acquaintances working at our neighborhood grocery store/deli. I don't think I quite realized how she had touched people's lives until word got out about her illness. Word also got out that she was uninsured. Cards, money, goodies, gift certificates, food,  and visitors started flooding in. My mom had mixed emotions about taking money from people. My whole life she's never been a person looking for hand outs. We have fell on hard times too often to recollect-but she somehow always made sure we didn't do without. Never on welfare. Never on food stamps. She cried inconsolably when she got the first card stuffed with money. Then when she walked in her old job and saw a collection jug with her story she cried as well. It took some convincing, but I think my brothers and I have showed her that taking money that is offered to us in our time of need is not failure.

Which brings me to my initial thoughts. I've been praying. I really want to understand the statement: "everything happens for a reason". I do. I want to believe "there is a plan in motion". But it is just very hard right now. I will continue to pray. I am actually attending church this Sunday. I wasn't raised a member of a church. I was just raised to believe. I am looking forward to learning more about who I am praying to.

While I am in a state of religious confusion-there is one thing I DO NOT DOUBT. That is the fact that angels exist. You know who you are. you are the people that offer to throw benefits and fund raisers, though you really don't have time. Your the people that stop by to say "I'm thinking of you" even though you're late for work. You are the medicaid employee that tries to rush our case. You make the phone call as your cooking supper just to say "if you need ANYTHING....." You take the time to make a banana pudding and walk it over. You give us the opportunity to cry on your shoulder. You share your story to uplift us. Your the receptionist that breaks the rules by saying "you can just make payments-it's fine" with a sympathetic tone. You are the hospital that gives $8,000 shots even though we cant pay. But most importantly, you are the ones that have kept us in your prayers nonstop.

Thank you, you beautiful angels on earth.