My Mili



Can I just brag for a minute?

I talk about the big girls all the time, because they are verbal and more active and more involved in different activities....But, I have to brag about my little one tonight. She's just something else. My little baby (who refused to sit up until she was almost 8 months old) has started crawling, waving, blowing kisses and actually saying "bye bye" all THIS week. I knew she was smart, but I'm pure blown away by her meeting so many milestones in the last few days! She will be nine months on the 1st and I just can't handle it. I hate how fast time is flying. Mili is.....she is just.....I can't even explain it. When I think of her I get an ache in my heart. Like a good ache...I love her so much, it literally hurts. That's the case with all my girls. They are my life. And it truly is a beautiful life. Sometimes I think Mili is spoiled from all the attention she gets, and other times I worry she gets back burnered because of my other two active little angels. One thing is for sure, she loves me. When I walk in the room, those eyes light up and she lets out a shrill of delight. She will barely let anyone hold her, other than me. I love it, and I worry about it. I want her to be social and friendly and not afraid to interact with others. But I LOVE that I am her favorite. My big girls cater to her....Neva wants so badly to "mother" her, while she and Nori giggle together like best friends. I love, love, love that they are all so close. Just when I have that "was I crazy to have 3 kids back to back?" moment, I walk in on them rolling around and playing so sweetly together. Then, I know how incredibly perfect life is. Perfectly imperfect. Of all Mili's accomplishments this week, I will tell you the one I am most fond of...She let me rock her tonight. I...ATE....IT....UP. She has not let me rock her since she was around 3 months old. She prefers to lay in her bed and self soothe. But her little personality just exploded this week. She's so much more mature. It's just crazy how they seemingly change over night. It's truly miraculous. As for the rocking, I DO miss it. I will admit it. It's my fault that she grew accustomed to falling asleep on her own. I made it happen. I have three very young children, I can't pat them to sleep simultaneously. I just can't. So, as soon as she was old enough, I put her in her own room. Night after night at the same time I placed her in her crib to fall asleep. Soon, it was her routine. And, she does NOT like to break routine. With the craziness of having a family of 5, her sleeping habits usually come in handy. But in my down moments, I crave her. I want to hold her as she drifts into her dreams. It's a beautiful moment between a mother and her baby. So, when she laid her head on my shoulder earlier, my heart skipped a beat. The next thing I know, I am rocking and singing and she is laying calmly in my lap studying my face and rubbing my mouth (Just like Neva--to this day, Neva will rub my mouth to soothe herself. Weird, I know). Anyway, It was an incredible moment. My heart is still swollen. Then she started squirming and whining, so the moment ended. But it didn't matter. I was on cloud nine. I took her in her room, put her in her crib, told her "I love you, Mili. Bushel and a peck, hug around the neck, and ALL my heart". She smiled, rolled over and started sucking her thumb. I walked toward the door and looked back one last time. I saw my growing baby all curled up and cozy in her crib, with her little fleece sleeper keeping her warm. I smiled at the thought of how safe and secure she must feel. I love, that she knows she's loved. Then I flipped the light switch and walked away thanking God for my perfect little angel. I am hopelessly in love. I am so very, very blessed.